The toughest part about therapy is probably realizing how detrimental you have been to yourself and ways in which you’ve contributed towards allowing people to take advantage of you among other things.A feeling, award winning digital content creator and budding events hostess Murugi Munyi identifies with all too well.Murugi recently took to her socials where she opened up about one of the biggest eye-opening take-aways she had after months in therapy session.The mother of 3, who has been very vocal about her journey while championing for more people to seek out therapy, even when they assume they’re completely okay, voiced how deep her people pleasing tendencies were.And how deeply they’ve affected her relationship with other people as she sort of “resentfully” views them as ungrateful even though she’s the one who sets herself up.Content creator and events hostess“Here is one thing that therapy made me realize about myself that I am actively working to change. I do things for people because I see a need and I want to be the one to meet that need and I go above and beyond to do that thing for that person. Which they didn’t ask me for, they didn’t ask me to intervene, they didn’t ask me to go above and beyond! They didn’t even ask me to help them meet that need or do anything to help them address that issue!” Murugi frustratedly shared on video.Adding the cycle moves to her harboring feelings of anger or at times feeling unvalued because she constantly goes an extra mile for people, but they don’t seem to notice it. And even when they do, their mode of appreciation doesn’t match up to half the efforts she went through to help.Leading her feeling incredibly terrible.“And then, I get upset when they don’t recognize how much of an effort, how much of a sacrifice I have made to help them meet that need. Or to do that thing that they didn’t ask me to do. I get angry when they don’t recognize how much of a sacrifice it was for me to do it… that thing that they never asked me to,” the mother of 3 added.Murugi MunyiLuckily for Murugi, therapy has helped her identify this aspect of her character and she is working hard on resolving it and curbing her people pleasing tendencies.
“Who is the problem there? Is it not me? Doing things that someone didn’t ask for then getting mad when they don’t fall on their knees saying, “thank you so much for doing it,’ when they didn’t ask for it in the first place,”
Finishing up she shared a moment of reflection highlighting, “at the heart of it all, is the intention selfish or selfless? Is it that you want to be perceived as kind and nice and generous or do you genuinely want to help this person?”
Last year, while conversing with her best friend Lydia KM on the set of their podcast dubbed The Messy In-between (TMI) podcast the mother of 3 laid bare some of the challenges she strongly feels have been holding her back from attaining her full potential.
Murugi Munyi shared her second biggest misconception about herself and life in general is the belief that she has to carry the worlds of her loved ones heavy on her shoulders irrespective of the fact that she is also just human.
Noting this trait often times makes her fail to recognize or celebrate the magic of a personal moment as she downplays the wins.
This is after Lydia posed the question, “What are your beliefs limiting your potential?”
“That I am not only responsible for my own growth and success but also for all those around me… especially my sisters.
Hence then I cannot see true success or true awe of things unless everyone else is up there with me,” the former Wild by Murugi CEO shared.
To which her best friend strongly agreed with, highlighting Murugi often times struggles with the need to build everyone around her.
