Neno Evangelism founder Pastor James Ng’ang’a has strongly criticized men who refer to women they haven’t paid dowry for as their wives, calling them liars and terrorists.
“If you have not paid dowry for your wife, you are a liar and a terrorist. Do not call her yours. But if you pay her dowry, she becomes yours—spiritually and physically,” Ng’ang’a declared.
He stated that making things official through dowry payment helps couples take their relationship more seriously.
“If you just picked her up from somewhere, you will part ways the same way,” he added.
The controversial pastor also dismissed the notion that having children together automatically means a couple is married.
“What is giving birth? People have been giving birth; you are the ones who are late!” he scoffed.
Advises Men Against Leaving Their Wives in the Village
Ng’ang’a also cautioned men against marrying and then leaving their wives in the village while they hustle in the city. According to him, couples should live together and build their lives as a team.
“Wealth comes and goes. Do not take your wife to Murang’a to stay in the reserve while you’re in the city. Uchumi ni mbaya nini?” he questioned.
He also warned about the dangers of leaving wives in rural areas, saying it often leads to marital problems and gossip from in-laws.
“How can you take your wife back home? She can’t even go to the salon in peace without your mother suspecting she’s seeing someone else. Because you are stuid, you decide to listen to your mother.
The wife is yours; she does not belong to the public. If she is not making you happy, she makes me happy.”*
Ng’ang’a’s remarks touched on a reality many marriages face—men leaving their wives in rural homes while they pursue financial success in urban areas, a setup that often leads to infidelity and broken families.
Ng’ang’a’s bold remarks sparked mixed reactions from Kenyans, with some agreeing while others dismissed his views on dowry.
Some of those reactions are below:
Luckie Dan
“I have a friend who has paid dowry three times. The first wife left—money wasted. The second one also left—money wasted. Now he is on Volume 3. May God help him. Dowry doesn’t stop a woman from leaving you; it’s only useful in case she dies, so she can be buried at your home.”
Evangelist Steve Joshua
“Even those who pay dowry still end up separating.”
Dinah Osore
“For once, he has spoken sense!”
Milly Nyambura
“For the first time, I agree with him on this.”
Evelyn Chelangat
“For the first time, I agree with him. You struggle to raise a child, then someone takes her like a hot cake—shame!”
Kendi Muthuri
“Love and respect are more important than dowry. You don’t just pay dowry for any simpleton or joker.”
Hesborn M. Gitahi
“Women of today don’t understand the meaning of dowry, so stop interfering in our lives, Commander.”
Isaac Wangokho
“Dowry was meant to be paid for a virgin girl, not these culprits with over 100 body counts. We are just helping them and doing them a favor by marrying them.”
Wafula Oscar Munialo Kikayi
“In this generation, you shouldn’t rush to pay dowry. Women can change at any time… They can disappoint you anytime.”
by PENINAH NJOKI
