They are commonly known as sugar daddies and sugar mummies. They are older men and women who opt to date – and sometimes marry – younger partners on the expectation that they would fund their soft lives.
In Kenyan parlance, they nowadays go by the nicknames mubaba (older moneyed man), mumama (older moneyed women), sponsors, blessers and Aunty wa Harrier among other names. They are not often viewed in a positive light because a large majority of them are often married and go around collecting sugar babies outside their marriages.
They are known to destroy the relationships of the youth – young people already in relationships with their peers but in the quest for a soft life and money, take on sugar parents on the side.
But, if you are the open-minded type, you would know that there are some benefits to dating wababa and wamama beyond providing them with an active sexual life and them financing a lifestyle for you in turn, especially if they are not married.
You ask what benefits? Here’s some of them:
- Wamekula chumvi (they have a lot of life experience) and they can teach you a thing or two about how to navigate life. Believe it or not, some of them could be in positions to give you wisdom nuggets and broaden your insights about various aspects of life.
- When they are not financing your lifestyle, they can teach you about how to manage your own finances- especially if it is money you are earning outside the relationship. They can give you tips on how to financially secure your future so that you are not stuck in a rut when the relationship ends and you have to start selling things to fund and maintain the lifestyle they provided for you.
- In this age of social media and living modern lives, many youth have forgotten their cultures… if you happen to be in a relationship with an older person who is from your tribe, they can help you reconnect with your roots, know where you come from and how culture can shape your future.
- There is nothing as exhausting as dating a person with whom you have a very small age gap. You both know the same things, you are both busy rushing around trying to set up your lives, you want different things in life before you can come to a consensus and agree on something that will work on both of you. But dating an older person could mean less drama in your dating life. See, older people already went through the drama phase and know they don’t want to go through it again. They want drama free lives and this will save their younger partners the pressures that come with such dramas.
- Believe it or not, older partners may provide the love, attention and care younger partners cannot provide to youth who are dating. They know what younger people need, probably because they have kids or younger relatives somewhere- so they will know what kind of nurture and support their younger partners will need when they face hardships.
If you insist on dating wababa and wamama, try as hard as possible and stay out of anyone who made marriage vows… because karma is real.
BY WINNIE MABEL