Mantalk: Hold on, our love and dreams will triumph

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In Kenya, there are millions of boys with a dream. And I know a lot of my peers are disillusioned that maybe you have to know someone big or have a tall relative somewhere, but that is not always the case


The past few weeks have been draining with a capital D. What I wouldn’t give to be a child again, I am not sure of. But I cannot live in Neverland. At this moment, everyone is looking for anyone to tell them that everything’s going to be all right. We’ve been here before.  We’ve heard it before. We know how the script goes.


Yes, we know, elections have a way of shining the mirror on us.


Yes, we know, young people claim to be woke only on social media but kwa ground, we mostly still vote on that mtu-wetu platform. You know that place? That place behind the ID? It’s not wrong, or right, it’s just one of those things that we like to hide. The black sheep of the family.


Yes, we know, no one’s coming to save us. This isn’t Bethlehem or Jerusalem or Harlem. But here’s the other thing, you don’t need anyone to save you. We may be a lot of things as a country, but this is also where every man has a chance. That we can all have dreams and work toward them. In Kenya, there are millions of boys with a dream. And I know a lot of my peers are disillusioned that maybe you have to know someone big or have a tall relative somewhere, but that is not always the case. I know that’s what it looks like, but do yourself a favour and do your best. Because while the dream is free, the hustle is sold separately.


Dreams forgotten


Yes, I know, this world can be unforgiving to a man. That is the crime of which I accuse my country and my countrymen.


Yes, I know, the pain of having to readjust said dreams. And why not? I know that you may still have time to achieve the dream, but you no longer have the energy for it. But really, what are men without their dreams?


I know that you will wake up in the morning and you will still be a father. A brother. A friend. A lover. There is no time to throw a pity party and lament, waiting for a miracle. There is no miracle – miracles only happen in the Bible and Hollywood. This is neither a sermon on the mount nor a movie.


So, yes, we know it all. We have heard it all. We have seen it all.  


I am sure everyone has gone through something and lost (or won) something. But this is the time to be careful of what we say. It’s easy to become a rabble-rouser and let emotions cloud judgment, but it takes much more strength to restrain yourself.


I have seen scores of those who live with a youthful rage, of this country that takes and takes and takes. But still, we dream. Because what are men without their dreams? And I am not asking you to buy into my philosophy, for everyone needs an optic through which they see their own life.


At the end of the day, this is our country. The only country we have and though we may not always agree with it, we need men who can provide leadership. Who can put the interests of the nation above self. And to me, this is where I call on my fellow young men. Do not forget that we are all disillusioned. It’s our sweat that waters this country. We are all in the same boat. We all dream of the same dream.


Sober on Twitter


If I sound political, it’s because circumstances have permeated me to be. Now more than ever we have to rise up to the occasion and remember that we are all we have. We have to be sober even on Twitter. Especially on Twitter. It’s easy to stoke the emotions, but it is much harder to remain balanced. Forget all these other things you hear about manhood; restraint is the feather in the hat. It’s maintaining a cool head when all others are losing theirs.


I know that society has forced our hand: you always have to choose a side. But being independent of mind and having your own moral code is a choice too. There is a legal phrase in Latin: “Nemo dat quod non habet (you cannot give what you do not have).


We are taught from a young age that the consensus view must be the correct one. That “not everyone can be wrong” guides our decision-making.  We are in a rat race. And the problem with being in a rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat. 


Fear not

 

Don’t fear. Fear is the path to the dark side. This country can (expletives removed) you up, if you let it. It may not mean to, but it will. It will beat you with a belt and snidely emasculate you, too. It will tell you who you are and who you are not. This country will slowly beat out your impulse to dream. But only if you let it.


And here’s one other thing that I – we also know. Something obvious. Look up the sky. The weather is always changing. Inconstancy is a double-edged sword. It bleeds fear as well as hope. The good weather may not last forever. But the bad isn’t permanent, either.


What is fascinating about us is that so many people are looking for reasons to be unhappy. That’s the paradox of life. We feel most alive when we are suffering; the best things to remember are the worst things that have happened to us. 


Yes, you probably know that I am a big fan, fanatic even, of James Baldwin. You know that I will probably quote him, so here goes: “Many of us know better, but as you will discover, people find it very difficult to act on what they know… to act is to be committed, and to be committed is to be in danger.”


I dare you to act. While everyone paints the world grey and black and white, while everyone finds an excuse in their armoury to blame someone else, you, dear friend, may inject a tinge of colour with your audacious dreams. I dare you to keep dreaming. For are men not governed by their dreams?    BY DAILY NATION   

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