Men can be an embarrassment

 

I read somewhere that you cannot spell embarrassment without men. Before you start screaming "man hater", let me say generally, relationships can be very embarrassing.

Men just handle it better maybe or have fewer chances to be embarrassed or are better at mitigating risks of having the short end of the stick. I really do not know.  

As a woman though, I know a man can really embarrass you. It is not if, it is when. I think you can avoid embarrassments. I was telling a friend the other day that at my age, I must avoid heartaches. Right now, a heartbreak can literally send me to bed with high fever and hallucinations. So, I have learnt a few ways to help myself, maybe you can be helped too. 

I always tell my man where I will be. Not because I really want him to know my whereabouts, but because I do not want him to be there with a surprise (woman). I will always say I will be at such and such with my girlfriends or another place with a guy pal having a drink. I am too old to walk into a place and find him with someone. I cannot manage anymore those donkey type kicks to the chest shocks.  

So what I am trying to say is, see ahead and buffer your heart.

Because we have agreed it is a matter of when not if, choose a man who leans towards women whom you would not feel too bad if you found him with. If fate is cruel that is. This you must decide before you get involved with the guy.

There is nothing as bad as being a woman put together, you know how to string English words together into intelligent sentences, a career charting type only to find him with a young girl who thinks hospitality is a study of hospitals.

 Do not be a detective. Do not check his phone. Most importantly, do not call the number that keeps calling him. Please do not. Unless you are a masochist, then by all means enjoy. You can call a woman demanding to know who she is and thinking by telling her who you are you will scare her. You might just find out from her that you are the lady who supplies him with boxers and socks. That you are not his type but you are forcing issues. Please choose peace.

When you first meet a man, he can tell you anything, and he is very convincing about everything. If you let your hormones cloud your judgement, you will believe a man who tells you he has a $10 million company but he lives in the outskirts of Nairobi on Mombasa Road in a rental because he is a down to earth man who prefers simple living.

Save yourself some embarrassment and carry your brain or masturbate before a date, whatever works. Just do not embarrass yourself with some of these monkeys unless you want to be part of their circus.

Get good friends and be a good friend too. There is a woman who insists on hanging out with her other half even when it is a girls’ night out. On many occasions, the drink will get to her first and will not be in the right frame of mind to 'monitor' her man. He will use this opportunity to dance too close to her friends, wink fervently like he has a log in his eye, and generally be inappropriate. But this lady has good friends who do not give in to his advances and do not feel that is information she needs thereby saving her a lot of embarrassment.

Give him space. Get your space. You cannot domesticate a man. If you cannot stop even a dog from wandering, do you think you can be successful with a human being?

Get your hobbies and your friends. I know you thought you could spend every breathing moment with him but it is not sustainable daughter of other people. It is a recipe for disaster.

Some of these suggestions may not be logical. Nothing is logical when it comes to a relationship with a man. We are just trying to make it to the end sane.  BY THE STAR